What they might say about A Long Night

‘Muslims should not read this book. It will hurt their feelings and they will be confused and outraged.’
Majelis Ulama Indonesia

‘Deeply outrageous and insulting about Catholicism. Quite fair about Islam, though, objectively speaking.’
Pope Benedict XVI

‘If we had a decent blasphemy law in this country covering all religions we wouldn’t have to put up with this continuous abuse and insult. I am sure most ordinary, decent, hard-working Muslims will be outraged by this.’
Muslim Council of Great Britain

‘It is just another episode in the crusader campaign. The double apostate Mahmood is another misbegotten spawn in the line of the Indian apostate, Rushdie; the Danish satanic doodler, Westergaard; the English teddy bear conspiracist, Gibbons and the five thousand times cursed American and Jewish mockers of God and His Prophets, Parker and Stone. The Hand of God is slow but it will grip hard and strong and tear out your tongues and break your hands. You are living in a fool's dream but soon you will be cut down and no one will ever hear of you again. Victory will be to the Righteous. You will fail in your evil conspiracies and plots to confuse and disturb the minds of the Righteous. You will fail, you will fail, you will fail. As sure as I am President of the Islamic Republic of Iran, you will certainly fail. The skins of apostates and mockers of the Apostle of Allah will burn and grow and burn again in the darkest and smelliest part of hell. You will only have boiling water to drink. You are the most despicable of things in the universe. Cockroaches spit on you and turn away from you in disgust.’
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad

‘I need a coffee. An Irish coffee.’
Dermot Ahern TD

‘Do I know you?’
Christopher Hitchens

‘Do you realise what time it is here?’
Dan Dennett